hotite-pogovorit-somnoy-pro-eto

Хотите поговорить со мной про ЭТО?

Заинтригованы темой?

А теперь представьте, как меня интригуют клиенты, которые описывают свои проблемы загадочным словом «это».

«ЭТО мешает мне жить»

«Я хочу от ЭТОГО избавиться»

«Что мне теперь с ЭТИМ делать»

Человек не говорит напрямую о том, что его беспокоит, ходит вокруг да около, избегая называть источник проблемы. Кажется, если не озвучивать, не произносить «страшное» слово вслух, то проблема не приносит неудобств или вообще не существует. А если о проблеме говорить, то она словно увеличивается, причиняя страдания. 

На самом деле, все совершенно наоборот.

hotite-pogovorit-somnoy-pro-eto

Помните детские ощущения, когда схватили в школе двойку и мучительно думаете, как об этом сказать родителям? Очень велик был соблазн не говорить, выбросить дневник или вырвать страницу. Казалось, что нет дневника — нет двойки — нет проблемы. Те, кто практиковал подобное, знают, что игнорирование проблемы ни к чему хорошему не приводило: двойки рано или поздно обнаруживались (обычно в самый неподходящий момент), исправить уже шансов не было, а раскрывшийся обман делал разговор с родителями еще более неприятными.

Сейчас мы взрослые и скрываем наши трудности не от родителей, а, в первую очередь, от самих себя, поэтому и возникают разговоры про «ЭТО». И, как и в случае с двойками, проблемы от этого только усугубляются. Выход только один: «вывести из сумрака» то, что тревожит. Страх становится меньше, если назвать его по имени, встретиться лицом к лицу.Недаром важнейшим шагом в избавлении от всевозможных зависимостей является признание проблемы — ведь сложно справиться с тем, что не имеет названия.

Один мой клиент, у которого были сложности с запуском своего бизнеса, в течение нескольких сеансов говорил, что ему мешает туманное «ЭТО». В конце-концов проблема обрела словесную форму: «ЭТО» оказалось страхом неудач. Как только получилось проговорить страх, назвать его, мы с клиентом достаточно быстро разобрались, что можно сделать, чтобы этот страх не мешал, а помогал двигаться вперед. Я уверена, что в любой ситуации крайне важно озвучить проблему, почувствовать дискомфорт, который при этом возникает, прожить его, увидеть сердцевину… и почувствовать облегчение. Ведь то, что вы можете воспринимать спокойно, больше не управляет вами.
А разговоры про «ЭТО» лучше оставить для телешоу.

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